Proverbs 31 Woman 2012 version

A while back I was reading through Proverbs 31, and I have always found the idea of the Proverbs 31 woman a bit overwhelming. But then I began to think, if I put in terminology of 2012 maybe it wouldn't seem so unattainable. So I rewrote it for myself, and thought I would share it with all of you. I left the original version on the left so you can see what the actual bible says against what I rewrote.

Proverbs 31- NIV	Proverbs 31--2012
10 A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies.	10 Who can find a wife of outstanding character? For her value is far more than stocks and bonds.
11 Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value.	11 The heart of her husband is safe with her, and he has no areas of distrust.
12 She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.	12 She brings him good and not a headache everyday
13 She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands.	13 She keeps her family on a balanced budget by spending wisely and clipping coupons.
14 She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar.	14 She is like an endless pantry; she brings her food from the grocery store.
15 She gets up while it is still dark; she provides food for her family and portions for her servant girls.	15 She also gets up while it is still dark outside and gets the family going for their day and prepares snacks for teacher appreciation week.
16 She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.	16 She researches investments and buys low ; from her investment returns she buys new appliances
17 She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks.	17 She works out 3 times a week and she strengthens her arms, legs and core muscles.
18 She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night.	18 She knows that she has a lot to offer any employer; and she is prepared for the unexpected.
19 In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers.	19 her hands work with integrity and purpose
20 She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy.	20 She bags groceries for convoy of hope and gives the "will work for food" guy on the street corner all her change.
21 When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet.	21 She is not afraid of the snow because she has changed all of the closets over to winter clothes and has plenty of Kleenex.
22 She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple.	22 She buys her clothes on sale; her clothing is practical, modest and cute!
23 Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.	23 Her husband has a good reputation because she brags on him and tells her girlfriends of his kindness and generosity
24 She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the merchants with sashes.	24 She lists the kids gently used and outgrown clothes on eBay and leaves nice notes and treats for the postman, garbage men and UPS man.
25 She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.	25 She is known for her strength and honor and she can laugh at the time to come.
26 She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.	26 She offers wisdom, and she gives loving words to others.
27 She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.	27 She is aware of where her children are, what they are doing and what they are looking at on the internet and she makes good use of her free time.
28 Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her:	28 Her children think she is wonderful, her husband brags on her to his friends saying
29 "Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all."	29 "Many women have been good at this or that, but they ain't got nothing on my woman"
30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.	30 Charm is deceitful and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the LORD will be respected.
31 Give her the reward she has earned, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.	31 Give her the day off on mothers day and her birthday and let her works be known through out the community and church!